cultofthepigeon replied to your post “Okay, we had a fantastic Halloween discussion a couple months ago, and…”
i can’t imagine john NOT trying to deep fry a turkey
Shit. YES. He put off baking it because it takes sooooo looooong, and everything’s better fried anyway.
skeleton-truck replied to your post “skeleton-truck replied to your post “skeleton-truck replied to your…”
There was probably something else that was gross in the super soaker first and he tipped it out to pour tequila and energy drink into it, but it tastes vaguely of something like Listerine, garlic and cranberry sauce.
I WAS TOTALLY GONNA SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT TOO, like there was something vaguely questionable that had been in there at one point, or maybe he HAD cleaned it out but whatever it was had sat in there for a while beforehand and the plastic smelled of it and now gives whatever else is in there a vague nasty aftertaste. And it was probably some combination of things meant to either fight evil or annoy Dave. Or both.
OKAY SO I’VE PROBABLY TOLD THIS STORY ON HERE BEFORE, and I know a bunch of you heard it individually but if I did post it I didn’t tag it well and tumblr user midwestern-tunneling-explodebear hasn’t heard it so I’m posting it again.
Okay, so when I was in high school I wound up hanging out with this boy who was okay at first but then he kept being… clingy. Which I’m usually okay with because lord knows I can be clingy but he just. Kept finding me and showed up at my house a few times, and it annoyed me but I’m shit at saying no.
So one day I’m home sick and this boy comes by my house and my mom’s home. She has some impressive muscles, and at this particular moment she was wearing a sleeveless shirt, and she had just gotten back from her hapkido class so her muscles were doing that kind of post-workout bulgy thing. She answers the door, leaning casually against the doorjam, smiles, and says, “Yes?”
The boy gets a scared look on his face starts stuttering, “Is- Is uh- is uh-” gesturing towards my bedroom window.
Mom says, “Is Devon home?” He nods with a scared look on his face and she says, “They’re sick right now and sleeping, but if you’d like I can wake them up?”
And he says really frantically, “NOIT’SOKAY,” and runs away. And he never came back and I never saw him again.
And that’s the story of the time my mom scared a boy away from my house.
(A side-note for Cassandra (and wow, I just realized I’ve never really used your name I don’t think?): she once gave me her old leather jacket because her muscles got too big for it.)
skeleton-truck replied to your post “skeleton-truck replied to your post:Okay, we had a fantastic Halloween…”
They wake up in the morning, john is sitting next to the closet door surrounded by empty energy drink cans, with a hacksaw in his lap and a super soaker next to him. Amy is asleep on Dave, she is all decked out in Christmas stuff and Dave fell asleep trying to reach for some…
Yessss. John loves his super soaker. I hope some of the energy drinks went into the super soaker once they calmed down a bit so he could just squirt it into his mouth.
One of Dave’s Christmas presents to Amy was some kind of “nerdy” Christmas joke shirt he got off of zazzle or redbubble. A Christmas pun relating to a fictional character which a picture of the fictional character underneath the pun. He got the sizing wrong but it’s not too bad and she wears plenty of ill-fitting stuff anyway. Dave was pleased because she changed into the shirt in front of him.
Its a weird day where nothing happens except they all sit around trying to do a normal Christmas thing but they are all waiting for something really weird to happen which makes everything awkward.
Dave spends the whole Christmas dinner suspiciously eyeing the failed turducken, waiting for there to be some kind of catch. I am so down with this.
Tonight’s awful Dad Joke.
Me: “I can put the trash cans out if you want.”
Dad: “I already put them out.”
Dad: “Bet you didn’t even know they were on fire.”
Dad: “Put them out. Because they were on fire. Ba-dum-tss.”
Okay, we had a fantastic Halloween discussion a couple months ago, and I can’t really think of anything else to say that isn’t a terrible “AU where everything is the same except” post. So.
Holidays. Amy, John, and Dave. The Epilogue of TBiFoS indicates that they celebrate Christmas, at least primarily. It gives us more background than we had for Halloween. But, still, how do they celebrate? Whether or not they’re living in a trailer at the time. When they’re not limited by space and money, do they have full Christmas trees? What kind of gifts do they give each other? I mean, John got a crossbow (or was giving it? It just said “John’s gift” so), which makes sense, and we know John’s given David ridiculous gifts before, but.
I think Amy gives David a couple different presents, maybe one big one and a couple small personal ones or just a bunch of smaller ones, and one of those presents is naked pictures of her, because she’s so matter-of-fact about that stuff. Except she doesn’t pick and choose the “best” ones so there are a few where she’s making a weird face or something’s blurry and at least one where Molly was interfering in a dog way for some mysterious dog reason.
Amy tries to decorate the tree with candy canes like some people do and Molly does her best to steal the low-hanging ones when no one’s looking. A wigmonster probably takes one too.
I bet at some point John decides they HAVE to have a turducken, because how cool is that. Their efforts probably fail in some way because following directions.
These are just a couple of my ideas. What about you all? Thoughts? New Years Eve ideas are also fantastic.
(And if you happen to ship them ot3, or even if you don’t, imagine John taking naked pics as well. Possibly photoshopping them before gifting them.)